REVEALED!! 10 Places Where "SHIFT LEMME FAINT" Would've Appeared In The Bible by #ComedianYanbaba

The controversial talkative, creative monster and crooner "Selfie Laughs" Comedian Yanbaba has just revealed the 10 possible places where the trend SHIFT LEMME FAINT slogan would've appeared in the Bible if it were co-authored by him

See his version below

OLD TESTAMENT.

1. Serpent: why haven't you tasted the forbidden fruit?

Eve: we were told that the day we will eat it,we shall die!

Serpent: hahahahaha, die ko live ni,and you believed him?

Eve; yes.

Serpent:

Eve: why are u not saying anything?.

Serpent: I'm waiting for my turn to faint,other animals are already fainting one after the other.

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2. God: Adam Adam where are you?

Adam: God,... We are naked!!!

God: what kind of nonsense is this,what does where you are have to do with whether you are naked or not?.... No I am God, I can't afford to faint .

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3. Angels to Abraham: your wife Sarah will conceive and shall give birth to a son.

Sarah: lol,do this people know how old I am?,..nobody should hold me oo I want to faint.

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4. Abraham; son you know I love u..

Isaac: abeg make I hear, u almost sacrificed me..

Abraham: I was just joking when I lifted that knife..

Isaac: I wont say anything again until I see mummy Sarah,I need to give her this ur hot lie,so that she can follow me and faint..

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5. Reuben: Papa why was it just Joseph u made the clothes of many colors for?..guess he is your favourite.

Jacob; nobody is my favorite oo,I love all of u equally..

Reuben: nobi only equally..lemme call my brothers first, levi!!,Simeon!!, judah!!,Dan!!,nephtali!,Gad!!,Asher!!,isacchar!,zebulum!,Benjamin!!, please all of u should come oo..

Judah: brother Reuben,we are here,what is it?

Reuben: make una follow me hear oo,Papa said that he loves all of us equally,that Joseph is not his favorite oo..

Judah: hahahahaha, 

everybody Biko,on your marks,get ready,set..... FAINT!!!!

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NEW TESTAMENT

6. Disciple: master how many times are we to forgive somebody, then we stop forgiving?

Jesus: 70×7

Disciple: u say?..please Matthew spray that your mat,lemme faint on it.

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7. Man 1: are u not one of the disciples of him (Jesus)?

Peter: me?,which man?..noo

Man 2: your face looks familiar, we use to see u with Jesus..

Peter: I can see your eye is paining you.

Man 3: excuse me,are u not the

fisherman, one of the followers of Christ?

Peter; me,fisherman?, nooo, I'm a prison warder..

Jesus: I said it,he will deny me three times,when did peter become a prison warder,please can u people stop flogging me, I want to faint for 2mins..

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8. Nicodemus: rabbi,how can I enter the kingdom of God?

Jesus: you have to be born again.

Nicodemus: you mean I should enter into my mother's womb and be reborn?

Jesus: chai,..please shift for me..

Nicodemus: any problem rabbi?

Jesus; not really, I just want to faint.

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9. Joseph: who is responsible for your pregnancy?

Mary: an Angel ministered to me saying I shall conceive by the holy spirit...

Joseph: which angel?,I thought you are a virgin?

Mary: yes I am still a virgin.

Joseph: a pregnant virgin?.. Can u please lie on the floor..

Mary; what for?..

Joseph: I want to faint on ur body, I can't faint on the floor, I'm having chest pain.

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10. Jesus; one of you will sell me for 30 pieces of silver..

Peter; it can't be me.

John: this one weak me.

Matthew: taa!,kamnukwa.

Judas; God forbid!!, it can never happen..

Jesus; judas, u say??

Judas: I said it can never happen..

Jesus: lol.. Luke can u please clear this table, the last supper is over, I want to faint on the table...

Happy Holiday guys..

Written by Yan Baba

#ComedianYanbaba